


from the corner of the window pane

by PaperBirdhouses



Series: an abrasively sharp lullaby and other things [3]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, Gen, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), basically alpha dave and rose adopted dirk and roxy before they had to be sent to the future
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 11:35:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29857488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PaperBirdhouses/pseuds/PaperBirdhouses
Summary: Mom is quiet from the other side of the wall. Roxy tries to understand.
Relationships: Roxy's Mom | Alpha Rose Lalonde & Roxy Lalonde
Series: an abrasively sharp lullaby and other things [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2173260
Comments: 8
Kudos: 17





	1. crabcake

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG]

CG: OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE. 

TG: geex 

TG: sumbodys crabby 

TG: thats leik ur whole deal rite 

TG: geez** like** 

CG: PLEASE STOP THIS RIGHT NOW. 

CG: GOD KNOWS HOW YOUR MOM IS GOING TO REACT ONCE SHE FINDS OUT I’VE TALKED TO YOU. 

TG: dirk said u never talked 2 her 

CG: SHE KEEPS TO HERSELF. 

TG: then wats the bdf 

TG: bfd 

CG: LOOK, I SAID ROSE, BUT I MEANT DAVE. 

CG: SINCE HE WILL BE THE ONE TO BE GIVING ME SECOND HAND SHIT AFTER HE HIMSELF JUST HAD SHIT SHOVED INTO HIS FLESHY WINDHOLE. 

TG: gross lol 

TG: why wldnt my mom just hand deliver u the shit directly 

TG: cut out the middle man u kno 

CG: I COULDN’T HAZARD A GUESS AS TO WHAT SHE IS THINKING. HER STRATAGEMS ARE AS OPAQUE AS THE THIGHSOCKS OF ZAZZILEFAN. 

CG: BUT I GET THE IMPRESSION THAT SHE HAS THINGS IN MIND AS A CERTAIN ORDER. 

TG: dont i kno it 

TG: considerin how u were all part of the same fuckin rebellion 

TG: and ive never even talked to dirk until we both took a non consensual 2 century nap in the gentle embrace of some bullshit magic flower 

TG: even tho our parents were sibs and again 

TG: part of the same honkin ass lickin rebellion so thats weird 

TG: weird how even tho i had the chance of a normal childhood lalonde senior deemed that i be sequestered away instead 

TG: some weirdass stratagems indeed 

TG: super weird 

TG: also hs zazzerpan 

CG: WHAT’S WRONG WITH WHOSE PAN? 

TG: lol nvm 

TG: so like… whats good crabman 

TG: me im just casual 

TG: like just casually messaging one of my only friend’s dad in an unprecedented way with no ulreitr movies 

TG: ulterior motives** 

CG: I’LL TELL YOU THE SAME THING I TELL DIRK EVERY TIME HE IGNORES ME AND TALKS TO US: THAT WE CAN’T HELP YOU. 

TG: i need u to help me talk to my mom 

CG: HELLO? ARE YOU READING THIS? CAN YOU SEE THESE GRAY WORDS ON YOUR SCREEN? 

TG: look she might listen to you 

TG: she doesnt even read my messages 

CG: SHE DOES. I’M 100% SURE THAT SHE DOES. 

TG: that just kinda makes everything worose 

TG: worse** 

TG: cant you just give it a shot? im sure shed listen to you more than she would me 

CG: HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY THINK THAT. 

CG: ROSE IS THE MOST PARANOID PERSON ON THIS EARTH. 

CG: AND THAT’S SAYING SOMETHING. 

CG: I’VE NEVER MET HER, EVER. 

CG: BY THE TIME THE SHIT WITH THE CONDESCE HIT THE FAN, SHE WAS ALREADY LOCKED UP IN HER HOUSE TIGHTER THAN THE BATTERWITCH'S SECRET RECIPE VAULT. 

TG: i just want to talk to her once 

TG: is that so much to ask 

TG: i miss her why doesnt she get that 

CG: LOOK, I’M SORRY YOU’RE GOING THROUGH ALL THIS ALONE. BUT, I CAN TELL YOU THIS, ROSE WOULD NEVER WANT TO HURT YOU. 

TG: sure 

CG: I MEAN IT 

CG: EVERYTHING SHE DOES, SHE DOES IT FOR YOU. SHE DOES IT FOR YOUR FUTURE. THERE’S REALLY NO ROOM FOR MISTAKES HERE WITH WHAT WE’RE DOING 

CG: AND WE’VE MADE MISTAKES, BELIEVE ME 

CG: BUT ROSE IS TRYING TO MAKE THE RIGHT MISTAKES 

TG: the right mistakes 

TG: so refusing to talk to me for half a decade 

CG: I KNOW IT DOESN’T MAKE MUCH SENSE BUT SHE WOULD ONLY DO THAT IF SHE THOUGHT IT WAS NECESSARY 

CG: THE LAST THING SHE WANTS TO DO IS HURT YOU 

TG: o yeah that means so much to me 

CG: … 

TG: sorry 

TG: im sure youre a nice crab man 

CG: I’M NOT A CRAB. 

TG: but its hard not to get upset that dirk still gets to talk to u guys while i cant get a peep out of my mom 

CG: YOU KNOW, I’VE LOST A LOT OF FRIENDS TO THIS ULTIMATELY FUTILE WAR 

CG: GOOD FRIENDS WHO I’VE KNOWN FOR SWEEPS AND SWEEPS 

CG: SOME OF THEM YOU COULD CONSIDER FAMILY BY YOUR HUMAN TERMS 

TG: crab man :( 

CG: CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT? TROLLS WITH FAMILIES? 

TG: im guessin by ur tone that would be p wild 

CG: IT WOULD BE 

CG: IT’S WHAT ALL OF US WANT 

CG: TROLLS HAVE BEEN FIGHTING FOR CENTURIES, ALL FOR A CHANCE OF JUST THAT 

CG: THAT FUCKING ATROCIOUS KELP CHOMPING MONSTROISITY OF A PERSON WHO CALLS HERSELF EMPRESS WOULD HAVE US ALL KILL EACH OTHER 

CG: THAT’S WHAT SHE’S BEEN DOING 

CG: THERE WAS NO ROOM FOR FAMILY ON HER ALTERNIA 

CG: IT’S AWFUL THAT YOU CAN’T BE WITH YOURS 

CG: MY FRIENDS LOST THEIR LIVES FIGHTING FOR THEIR FREEDOM AND FIGHTING FOR SOMETHING THEY’LL NEVER GET TO SEE 

CG: AND I LIVED SO THEIR DREAMS DON'T DIE 

CG: I KNOW THAT WHEN THE CONDESCE IS DEAD I WON’T BE AROUND TO SEE IT 

CG: EVERY LIFE LOST TO HER WE HAVE TO SHOULDER, AND SO WHEN WE ARE GONE IT GOES ON 

CG: UNTIL SHE FINALLY BREAKS UNDER ALL THAT WEIGHT 

CG: EVEN IF YOU LOSE SOMEONE EVERYTHING THEY ARE AND WHAT YOU CARE TO KEEP IS STILL WITH YOU 

CG: ROSE IS GONE BUT YOU STILL CARRY HER 

TG: and thats really nice of you to share your tragic backstory 

TG: but sorry im still sad 

CG: AT THE RISK OF SOUNDING LIKE A RAGING ASSMUFFIN, THAT’S FINE. 

CG: TO BE PERFECTLY HONEST I THINK THAT ROSE IS BEING A DOUCHEMAYO GUZZLING SHITBURGER BY NOT ANSWERING YOU. 

TG: hey :( 

CG: SORRY. 

CG: BUT SHE'S DOING IT BECAUSE SHE THINKS IT WILL PROTECT YOU, AND I CAN'T BLAME HER FOR FEELING THAT WAY. 

TG: yeah 

TG: i guess i cant either 

CG: SORRY, KID. 

TG: its k 

TG: i feel better now tho 

TG: how mad would u be if i talked to you again 

TG: just 4 a lil bit 

CG: DO WHAT EVER THE FUCK YOU WANT. APPARENTLY I WAS PUT ON THIS EARTH NOT TO FEND OFF THE CONDESCE BUT TO SAINTLY LISTEN TO THE WOES OF TWO WHINY TEENAGERS WHO WON’T LEAVE ME ALONE. 

TG: thanks crab man :DDDD 

CG: STOP CALLING ME THAT. 

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> by becoming the main chara of this au dirk is regulated to having the most normal relationship w his parents to serve as a foil 2 his adolescent friends who all have parental trauma


	2. if you want to focus on semantics, it's actually a wall, yes

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering  tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

TT: Hello, Roxy. 

TG: oh damn 

TG: had it not been 4 the lilac hues that shine thru my screen i woulda thought it was d-stri hittin me up 

TG: but no it seems that my own mother has finally deinged to answer her only child after all these years 

TT: It actually hasn’t been that long for me. 

TG: 

TG: 

TG: 

TG: sry i forgot how much of a total pill u r 

TT: It seems I have upset you. 

TG: no shit !!!!!!!!!!!!! 

TG: why are you talking to me now ???/?????? 

TG: right fukin now??? 

TG: im sure that u know im about to go into the stupid game rn rite???? 

TG: you and ur weird tentacle witchy seer shit 

TT: I didn’t mean to upset you. I wanted to speak with you one last time before 

TG: you gonna finish or what 

TT: i misspoke 

TG: what??? 

TT: nothing you need to worry abou 

TG: omg 

TG: omfg i cant fuckin believe this 

TG: ur actually 

TG: you 

TT: Roxy. 

TG: u really thought that adding more parental trauma would b a good idea????? 

TT: I 

TG: omfg i 

TG: so this is it then? 

TG: youre actually 

TT: ...Yes. 

TG: alright hang on, hang on ok 

TG: i need a sec 

TT: Don't worry, I don't have any plans. 

TG: well im glad u find this so funny 

TT: I don't. 

TG: ughhhh 

TG: i 

TG: i missed u so much 

TG: and i wanted to talk to you so much before u kno 

TG: we remade the univeres 

TG: i dont understand 

TG: why now? 

TG: and ive been watching this fuckin window 

TG: like hoping and hoping that you would come up to the attic and youd lift up the sheet and id 

TG: id be able to see you 

TG: and it would be like i never left 

TG: but all i get is nothing 

TG: put me in the attic so you never had to see my face again 

TT: How did you know it was up there? 

TG: i saw it myself 

TG: or i guess i should say i saw myself 

TG: when i was a kid 

TG: i went up and there i was starin right back 

TG: i dont think i actually understood that it was me 

TG: and then i told you remember 

TT: Ah, yes. I do seem to remember that. 

TG: ha 

TG: you were white like a ghost 

TG: you ran up the stairs to lock the attic shut 

TG: for once you were all shaken up and crazy eyed i didnt get it at all 

TG: and i STILL i dont get it 

TG: i get why you didnt tell little me but 

TG: why did you do that??? 

TG: is it 

TG: is it me? 

TG: i know you never asked for this but its not like i ever did either 

TG: it would make my life easier if you just said you hated me or something 

TT: Stop it Roxy, you know that's not true. 

TT: I’ve always loved you and I always will. 

TG: uve got a funny way of showing it 

TG: what did you want anyway 

TG: i guess i will hear you out since ur literally dying 

TT: Thank you, Roxy. 

TT: Please let me explain. 

TT: I do not see the future. 

TG: what 

TG: so what youve been guessin this whole time 

TG: found a cool flower and was like aw hell yeah ill stick my kid up in that bitch 

TT: Roxy, please. 

TG: sorry 

TT: I see countless paths to the future. 

TT: Many possibilities that could happen, and reaching those ends is a matter of how you act. 

TT: I saw you using the wall. 

TG: the what 

TT: The window. 

TG: oh 

TT: And I cannot bear to speak what happens next. 

TG: so wat ur saying is 

TG: based on ONE of the possible futures you saw 

TG: you thought that it would be a good idea for me to think that youd abandoned me 

TG: so i wouldnt try to see you 

TT: Put so callously, yes. 

TG: its 

TG: one fuckin thing after another with you 

TG: how stupid do you think i am 

TG: obvi im gonna kno that you would never abandon me 

TT: obviously 

TG: so ur plan straight up didnt work on that count 

TG: why dont you 

TG: why didnt you 

TG: why dont you trust me????? 

TG: OBVIOUSLY i wouldnt be stupid enough to go through the window 

TT: you dont understand 

TG: oh i think i understand perfectly 

TG: i think that ur prophetic little visions are heavily influenced by what you consider to be the truth 

TG: and i think that you thought that if you told me not to try to use the window that i would do just that 

TG: for what???? to spite you?? 

TT: roxy 

TG: this whole time dirks been talking to his parents 

TG: and i thought 

TG: theres no way that she wouldnt talk to me at least once right 

TG: i thought you would 

TG: miss me 

TG: or something 

TT: im sorry roxy 

TT: im so sorry 

TT: truly i am to have made you felt that way 

TT: this may just be empty words and too late but i love you more than anything in this world 

TT: i acted irrationally because i didnt want to entertain even the slight possibility that you would be in danger 

TG: im in danger right now 

TT: yes, i know. 

TT: i would hate to be the one to cause you any pain 

TG: could have fooled me 

TT: i suppose i deserved that 

TT: let me be honest with you 

TT: the reason why i thought that you might have used the wall was because i would have done that exactly, especially if anyone had told me not to 

TT: i know i should have given you more credit than that 

TT: roxy please tell me that you never thought that i stopped loving you even for a moment 

TG: no 

TG: i didnt 

TG: i saw you once 

TG: well more than once 

TG: though the window 

TG: i kept it plugged in all the time because i hoped maybe i could catch a glimpse of you 

TG: you thought i was sleeping but i wasnt 

TG: you were standing there watching me 

TG: and i wanted to get up and start yelling even if you couldnt hear me 

TG: make a huge fuckin scene 

TG: but 

TG: you looked so sad 

TG: nd u reached out to touch the window 

TG: and that was the only time i ever saw you cry 

TG: and i couldnt move or anything i didnt know what to do 

TG: so i closed my eyes 

TG: i didnt want you to leave so i closed them and didnt move a muscle 

TG: and then in the morning you were gone 

TG: a few weeks later it happened again 

TG: i know that you were doing your best 

TG: thats why this is so confusing 

TG: why didnt you try with me 

TT: i 

TT: you are stronger than i know 

TT: i see all of your potential, what you will do, what you are capable of 

TT: but i simply cant stop thinking of you as my daughter 

TT: i thought maybe if i didnt burden you by reminding with all of this 

TT: what you have to do and how much is depending on you and your actions 

TT: the condesce is not like anything of this world, figuratively and literally 

TT: she is a vile monster who has already taken so much from all of us 

TT: i thought that if i could distance you from her and all of this 

TT: you could stay young a little longer 

TT: i love you so very much 

TT: to think of everything youve been through and everything you will go through 

TT: you must be the strongest person i know 

TT: im so proud of you 

TG: mom 

TT: and im sorry 

TT: you didnt deserve this 

TT: im sorry i couldnt make things even a little easier for you 

TT: i have no excuses 

TT: but please never doubt that i loved you 

TG: i never did 

TG: i always knew 

TG: i love you 

TT: my dear roxy 

TT: this heinous bitch isnt ready for you 

TT: promise me that youll fuck her shit up 

TG: i promise mom 

TG: she will fucking pay 

TT: thank you 

TG: mom? 

tentacleTherapist [TT]is an idle chum! 

TG: :( 

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering  tentacleTherapist [TT]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thats it for this series! we are donion rings! hope you liked it :)  
> i do have more stuff in the works, unfortunately for the ppl waiting for me to update my naruto longfic, it is all davekat lmfao. ah well. so… see you soon? maybe?


End file.
